Runaway baby

Published Friday, 22 August 2014
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I don't know why, but for some reason it's when I'm out shopping with the children that they seem to produce more meltdowns than any other place (well the library probably comes in a close second).

They probably pick up on my anxiety and fear that they're going to disturb the readers and sure enough that's exactly what they go ahead and do. But I was fairly sure I was safe enough to put them both in the double buggy and just head to the express Tesco at the bottom of the street.

It was one of those persistent rainy days and the thought of getting into the car and being stuck in traffic was more depressing than just stepping out into air and getting wet on a wee walk down to the shops. Have you ever noticed that sometimes when it's all kicking off in the house/any other place - by just merely stepping outside - it changes the mood and they go quiet almost instantly. What magic potion does the air outside hold? I'd consider removing the roof off my house if we lived in a warmer climate.

Anyway off we headed, only bread and milk were required so I figured 3 minutes tops in the actual shop. All was fairly normal on the short walk there. No sign of anything untoward as we approached the shop either but little did I know what secret they were keeping so well.

As soon as we entered it immediately became very clear; I'd had forgotten to strap them into the pram... AHHHHHHHHHH! NOOOOOOOOoooooooo STOP! They both escaped within seconds of entering and then they were off - running round the aisles in different directions and not a chance of lending an ear to my pathetic pleas of come back now or ... you'll lose all your stars, you won't get your treat.. Santa will honestly put you on his black list forever. Whilst I was shouting at them they were skillfully dodging many innocent and unassuming customers who looked at me (quite rightly) like I had no control over my children.

Threats eventually worked for the elder but not on Kate who thought the longer she managed to escape my clutches the more hilarious it was. She kept on running, speed increasing and every time I went after her she ran the other way. No-one will interfere or help anymore less they be accused of some sort of child molestation so you're on your own. You're on your own all the way. I managed to catch her eventually and hold her down while she screamed at the top of her voice for what seemed like an eternity and caused me to look like I was using far too much force on a 2 year old to strap her in. She'd got herself into such an angry state that she could have given Big Daddy a run for his money in the strength department. And then click, mission almost impossible became complete.

Breathing huge sighs of relief I managed to restore calm and order to the situation, for a few moments anyway. I felt triumphant that no members of staff or customers were either injured or ever worse hopsitalised in the furore.

Lesson learnt; never go out again without doing a proper check on all operational matters.

© UTV News
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4 Comments
Gillian in Broughshane wrote (26 days ago):
This has brought back a discussion I had last year on holidays with my American cousin. On a day trip she had to stop at a drive-thro atm machine (brilliant idea), I said I wished we had those in NI. We talked about the hassle of getting kids out of the car for a quick message and I said I wished there was a drive-thro for milk and bread (ok and chocolate). Mums across the country would love it.
Nuala in Belfast wrote (36 days ago):
Sonia, You could have inadvertently have stumbled on an amazing entrepreneurial idea. 'Mummy's emergency rations delivery service!' Delivering bread, milk and gin to desperate mothers!! :)
Nicola Duffy in Dublin wrote (37 days ago):
Ohhhhh Sonia!!!! I was just thinking about you the other day as I came across a photo that triggered the fondest of memories! I love your blog and so excited to hear you are a mammy to two most beautiful kids...I would love to catch up with you, you will probably see my email address here... Xxxxxx
Ann Marie in Belfast wrote (39 days ago):
I laughed until I cried reading this! Although Sonia, I'm quite sure you were doing anything but laughing that day. It seems like shops and children don't go together very well. The next invention will be an alarm for unfastened buggy seatbelts!
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Sonia Butterworth
Sonia Butterworth

Sonia is a broadcast journalist and writer. She began freelancing for UTV in December 2012 having worked for several TV and Radio outlets.

She lives in Belfast with her two children, Liam and Kate, and her husband Keith.

In the (little) spare time she has she likes to write and just for good measure plays guitar and sings (although these days her audience tends to be age 4 and under).

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