Published Friday, 02 March 2012
You'd think that we TV hacks would be a fairly nifty bunch. Light on our feet. Well-balanced. But balance is a real problem for me.
I've had 40-plus years of trying to inject some balance into my life. So far, I've failed miserably.
I'm an adult, a married man, a father of three kids. But to my shame and eternal embarrassment I cannot ride a bike. As a child I couldn't even stay on a trike.
How I laugh (not) when people describe some fairly mundane skill and say, "Of course you'll remember how to do it. Sure, it's like riding a bicycle."
Falling over is a speciality of mine. I once stumbled against the big red 'Stop' button beside a department store escalator. As shoppers came hurtling down towards me, I beat a hasty (and red-faced) retreat.
My wife says when it comes to clumsiness, I'm just naturally gifted.
It's true that I broke my leg just days before flying off on holiday with her (it meant she carried the luggage and I came home sun-tanned apart from one plaster-cast leg).
It's also true that I managed to set myself on fire in church. I was blissfully unaware that I was too close to the candles until a man started beating out the flames on my back.
And let's face it, the chances of me running away to join the circus and become a tightrope walker are just about zero.
So, if you feel my journalism sometimes strays a little off-line, if you consider my reports a tad unbalanced, then have a little compassion.
Being perfectly balanced isn't always as easy as it looks.
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