Published Saturday, 06 October 2012
The Girls Aloud star's relationship was rocked in 2008 when a woman alleged she had had sex with England footballer Ashley Cole behind his wife's back.
The beauty has opened up about her devastation at the claims in her new book, Cheryl: My Story, which has been serialised in The Sun newspaper, and recalls: "I was in such a terrible state. I went and switched on the computer, alone, waiting for the story to appear...
"I was absolutely disgusted. I absolutely lost it... I felt every emotion possible: confusion, sadness, physical pain, sickness and fury, like I'd never experienced.
"Before I knew it, I was lashing out at Ashley in every way I possibly could. I hit him in the face - I couldn't help it. I was shaking him, kicking him, scratching his face, pushing and shoving him like I was a lunatic, and he just took it as it was obvious I had gone crazy.
"'I hope you enjoyed it!' I screamed. 'I hope she was worth it! It's the end of your marriage. You don't understand what you've done. It's f*****!' After hours of me ranting, screaming and crying uncontrollably, I was exhausted."
Cole reveals she "got pills off the doctor" to calm her down before heading off to Thailand with her bandmates Nicola Roberts and Kimberley Walsh to assess her options.
The singer subsequently reconciled with the sportsman, but the union fell apart two years later after further allegations about his infidelity emerged.
The Fight for This Love hitmaker filed papers to end the couple's four year marriage, and admits she turned to cigarettes and alcohol in a bid to deal with her heartache.
She writes: "I started smoking 20 cigarettes a day when I normally only have one or two, and I was drinking too, just to try and relax. I was well aware I could fall into a dark depression again."
And the singer also sought medical testing to ensure she did not have any sexual health issues as a result of her estranged partner's cheating.
She adds: "One day I went for a sexual health check, which was traumatic enough... I had to face the fact that Ashley's infidelity had been putting me at risk for a long time, and I had to put my mind at rest.
"I was given the all clear, but my emotional health was still in so much danger, having to deal with c*** like that."
Cole has since moved on from her marriage split and is is currently dating dancer Tre Holloway.